Posts
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Hot and Humid in Central Ohio for the Cup
A grand slam, a shut out, and a bunch of slap hitting shit goblins results in the Guards bringing the Ohio Cup home. Not that anyone cares about that.
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Stung in Tampa Bay for a 2 Shut-out Sweep
One hit? One lousy hit?! The Guards forgot hot to use the bats entirely, and until we can fix that, we ain’t goin’ nowhere.
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New Records and a Split With the Twins!
As it always is, Cleveland did great and then lost big. This time our bats did okay (except in the last game) and our fielding was iffy. Split series with the Twins.
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Yo Ho, Pirates! Lost the Series with Bad Air
We ran ourselves out of the games, not managing to bring runners home, screwing up the base paths, and not having much by way of hits. But Bazzana walked us off, so yay?
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No More Goblin Mode: How the Guards lost Mojo
The current slump isn’t a failure of talent but of chaos. The Guards have sanitized their offense, removing the pressures that allow clutch hitting to thrive.
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Reeling in a Series Win Over Miami
As we get ready for a few days off for the All Star Game, Cleveland finished the first half with a sweep of the Marlins, some amazing plays, and solid hitting.
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Sunk Series in the Land of Lakes
Fielding fuckery and bullpen blowups lead to a series loss against the Twinkies. We salvaged one game and have some things to work on.
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Split Series With Sox – We Had to Win
Two walk off wins, two rain delays, three one run games, and we split the series we really needed to win.
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Home against the Rangers – Guards Escape a Sweep
Two rough losses, and one decent win. The Rangers play like we do, never giving up. DeLauter is on a 10 game hitting streak, and José is on the mend.
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2026 Series vs Seattle goes to the Guards
A tense three game series, and we had trouble with the offense, but then the bats got crackin’ and we had a five run 8th to win the series.