Regular Season
2026 Standings
STK: L2
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Yanked Down By the Sox for a Loss
I don’t know, man, this was just a bad series for our ‘pen. Bibee remains cursed, Jose’s not hitting great, and we have no solid pinch hitter.
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Nats Hammer Changeups, Guards for Memorial Day
The Washington Nationals are insanely good this yeah, and I’m very glad we only play them once. They hammered the Guards to take 2 outta 3.
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Cheesesteaks, Rain, and Pitching Excellence
It rained all weekend in Philly, but the games played on and both teams’ pitchers put up amazing duels, while Cleveland fine tuned their lineup.
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Guards Catch the Skubaless Tigers By The Tail
There’s no Skubal or Verlander, and Bibee still catch catch a break, but the Guards faced Valdez and won, sweeping the Motor City Kitties in four!
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Guards Take Round One in the Battle of the C’s
Tito’s Reds take one, but the Guards bats erupt to take two. Bibee continues to be the no luck starter, while Big Rig and Cantillo show their stuff.
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Our Angel is in the Outfield: Guards Sweep 3
Cleveland sweeps the Angels, pitching staff solidifies, bats wake up, and Angel is our Angel.
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Series Loss – Bo to AAA, a Gold Glove Arrives
The Twins hate the Guards, Hedgey is our good luck charm, Bo is optioned to the minors, Bazzana hits his first dinger, and the beat goes on.
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Royal Ass Whupping: Split the Series with KC
There’s no way to sugar coat this, if we can’t figure out how to hit, we are fucked. Anyway, Kansas kicked our asses and we snuck in a split.
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Minor Ballpark, Major Hitters: Guards Punch the A’s
It took going to a minor league ballpark to remind our guys that they’re major league hitters. We’ll take it, but we need to steady our bats. Yeah, still.
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The Man from Down Under Arrives
Australia comes to Cleveland, and we manage to claw one back from the Tampa Bay Rays in a very rough week. Our bats need to wake up some more.